Dear White People
On May 29, 2020, personal-finance expert Patrice C. Washington shared on Instagram her experiences with racism, and described her position in the world as a Black woman. Although Washington had only spoken among her friends and never felt “compelled to speak publicly,” she has “personally evolved to just be like, ‘I can talk about whatever the hell I want to talk about,’ and this is just too heavy.” Before recording the video, she noticed that the silence of those who she considered friends was hurting her as much as the pain caused by deaths at the hands of police. “I realized that by me not using my platform sooner, I had built the idea that because maybe they saw me as an equal professionally or socioeconomically, they thought we were the same,” she says, adding that those friends did not “realize the burden” that Washington carries as a Black woman in 21st-century America. She then asks, “Because how does it come up in conversation?”
However, the time for silence has passed. In the video, Washington urges her white friends to speak up, take action, and take a stance (“Being non-racist is not the same as being anti-racist. You have to call it out, you have to be aware that this is really a thing, and we’re not just making it up”). When asked whether or not the response was positive, she responds, “80% has been positive feedback, I’ve seen people take stands and educate their audiences.” She is determined to give her white followers and friends a chance – even if it may take some time for them to understand. “I still am not in a place where I’m going to dismiss every ignorant comment because I think that maybe one in ten can be saved,” she shares. “I’m willing to say something for the one, I can go deeper with the people who are willing to really make an effort. We need every person to be open and willing to be a part of this if we’re actually going to create any type of change.”
As a Black mother to her 13-year-old daughter, moreover, Washington has been having conversations about racial injustice and racism for years. “We started pretty early with my daughter,” she recalls. “These conversations come up over and over again.” Thanks to TikTok videos and documentaries on Black history, furthermore, Washington and her daughter are both learning a great deal. “TikTok has told her way more than I ever did,” she says. “It is important to have the conversation, and I think for any Black parent, it is what it is – we have to protect them by telling them what the reality currently is.”
Upon practicing self-care methods to keep her mindset as positive and calm as possible, Washington is “just disconnecting from the news and social media. Bad news will be there when you get back.” She emphasizes the importance of “choosing, not waiting until you feel like it, but choosing a day” in order to fully disconnect and “give your brain an opportunity to rest.” She also prescribes laughter as a form of relaxation (“I literally just let myself go from one comedy special to the next on Netflix, just so I could laugh, uninterrupted”).
Washington hopes to raise awareness about racial injustice through her large platform, and to continue to offer words of wisdom to her clients. “What I’m really concerned about right now is the mental health of Black folk,” she adds. “The Loveland Foundation is one organization, I don’t feel the need to start my own, but I do feel like I need to bring light to the organizations that really are doing the work that I feel most aligned with. We’re going to see the wealth gap continue to widen if people don’t heal from this trauma.”
Writer: Sophia Mazurowski
Photographer: Katie Coon
Editor: Eiko Watanabe
Special thanks to Avalon (@avaloninsider - www.experienceavalon.com) & EPK Media (@myepk & @epkmedia - epkmedia.com)